Kett's POTD 2-16-11

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Sherman

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<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> Originally Posted by ragTagblues
Going to take a very calm breath before I say something you and I will regret . . . .
</td> </tr> </tbody></table>
Always a good plan - especially when dealing with ASC :shut:

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> What is wrong with a 14 year old proudly announcing his/her homosexuality, </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
The same thing that's wrong with a 14 year old having a crush on anyone. It's harmful to the child to entertain sexual attraction. I know that you are not likely to agree with my standard on this issue, but I want you to have a look at it, if you don't mind. People who are 14 are still in school but fairly close to it's end. They have all sorts of decisions to make before they complete their basic education: what direction they'd like to go for a career, what sort of lifestyle they'd like to have when they are on their own, what sort of person they want to be in terms of character and standards, etc. And having an idea of these, they must begin to map out a plan for achieving these goals. Having a plan, they must then implement it. Now if they decide that all they want is a low-level job and to only scrape by financially and socially, then there's no harm in just scraping by in school, but not many aspire to such low goals. Most will want to better their state, to find a way to get a career in an area of interest, to be able to rise up through the levels of that career area to steadily improve their financial standing, or to support a family in a lifestyle that is chosen.

The trouble with recent generations is that they seem to fly by the seat of their pants - no planning ahead, no thought for tomorrow. They seem to just go from one crush to another, skimping on the hard work of establishing a foundation for life. When this starts at 12 or 14, there is lots of time for establishing this bad habit. Too much is at stake to entertain such frivolity. And there is plenty of time for crushes and dating and whatever after the hard work of foundation-building is done.

One other point on this issue. It is quickly becoming a known fact that the human brain is still significantly maturing until the mid to late 20s. The teen-aged brain is very much in flux and processes emotions very differently than adults. So should we really be encouraging adolescents to trust their emotions? Should we be encouraging them to go down a path of emotional upheaval (dating of any kind) during a time when the brain can't really process the emotions and has much development to go? Should we condone this utter waste of time and energy at a time when they should be foundation building - working hard to ensure them as many good options for career/lifestyle choices as possible?

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> If encouraging people to admit they like people of the same sex means this pain can be avoided in the future, then damn right. </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
That's a big "if" - can this be shown by any decent study?

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> A 14 year old girl who admits to being gay, is still just a 14 year old girl, </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
That's right. She's only 14; her emotions aren't functioning properly and cannot be trusted; her brain is still developing the ability to think rationally; she has too many other things to think about to be bothered with sexual attraction of any sort at this critical time in her life.

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> She is probably still just interested in make up and being like her bigger older sister </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
Which could be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on her bigger older sister :shut:

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> So I put it to you, if homosexuality isn't natural and is a choice, why would anyone be gay? </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
Because they've been sold a bill of goods. They have been lied to and often pushed, and sometimes, as with the teen, have chosen based on untrustworthy emotion and then are too embarrassed or stigmatized by the gay community to change their minds. Sometimes it's due to abuse or trauma; sometimes by hormonal or chromosomal irregularity. Sometimes it's just a rebellious nature or anger at society or at God or the church or Christians (but now we're back to abuse or trauma) .

Quote:
<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr> <td class="alt2" style="border: 1px inset;"> Surely it is the wrong choice to make! It is the harder choice to live with as you will be stigmatized by fools like you and even sensible people! They will have to face constant abuse and hate crimes throughout their lives. Live their perfect lifestyle in absolute secrecy because of it . . . knowing that they may not be able to visit certain countries for being openly gay and if they do it could result in murder! Why would anyone in their right mind choose to live that life? It's a harder life then mine and yours ASC and I would never choose it; but then I wouldn't have to because it isn't down to choice! </td> </tr> </tbody></table>
I agree that sexual attraction is mostly innate, but that doesn't mean that there isn't choice. Otherwise there would be no homosexuals leaving that lifestyle, would there? I understand that the attraction to drugs is a very, very powerful thing for a former drug addict, so that each day without drugs is a victory won. Now imagine if the drug addict could turn to something that is also attractive - something that grows in attraction the more it is encouraged - something wholesome and healthy and good in every way? That would be a big help, wouldn't it? I have heard Mary Contrary say that her sexual attraction to her husband, partly because she encourages it, helps her to suppress her sexual attraction to women. And her healthy relationships with women, partly because she works to achieve them, help her to suppress her sexual attraction to women. Replacing the harmful and negative with healthy and positive things is a good way to really choose and not be forced to a choice by overweening emotionalism or even physiology or a society that applauds "coming out" at ages too young to even think properly.

We all choose how we behave. We all choose to indulge our whims and attractions or to suppress or redirect them. I am not fat because of the attractions I suppress; I am faithful to my husband in every thought because I redirect every other attraction instead toward him; I can dead-lift over 250 pounds because I suppress my natural lazy desire to sit on the couch and eat potato chips and redirect it toward being so healthy and energetic that I don't want to sit around. Life is in the choices we make.

A very well thought out post and politely done so, I might add. An excellent reply to Ragtagblues.
 
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