What is the downside to youth groups?

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Lagardo

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Originally posted by firechyld

I'm also bothered by the assumption that if teens are dating, then they are either already having sex or are about to.

"Dating" is not necessarily synonomous with "having sex".

No, it doesn't, and that is one of many reasons why this is a broader topic than simply "to go on a date or not?"

Teenagers need to be taught biblical standards for friendships, rommance, sex, etc. These standards should be applied from the ground up, rebuilt if necessary, rather than just tacked on to an existing method simply because its the norm.

A new trend I've noticed lately regardign teens and sexuality is "friends with privledges." (ie. Teens who do not want the hassle of being boyfriend/girlfriend but want to experiment sexually.) Then there is an even newer trend where a young man gives a braclet of a certain color to his girlfriend. This braclet indicates just what privledges his friends can have with her.

We have cheapend commitment. We have cheapened sex. Is dating to blame? Maybe not, but its not a sacred institution that must be preserved at all costs. Its time to examine this aspect of a teenager's life and rethink how we teach.

Originally posted by firechyld
As for the youth group thing, has anyone seen the episode of King Of the Hill where Bobby Hill joins a "cool" youth group?

Of all things, King of the Hill often has some very astute observations on Churches in society.

So, the "cool" youth group is at times laughable, so what is a church to do with teenagers? How should a church reach teens? How should a church disciple teens? Is there a place for the "coolness?"

Personally, as I've said all along, I'm not opposed to it. I'm a full-time youth pastor but I think we need to question all of this. I'm currently remodeling our youth center and you better believe that its going to be pretty "cool." I'm just trying to make sure that the subwoofer, lights, Third Day music, etc don't take center stage.
 

Lucky

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Okay, now that I listened to the show...
Originally posted by Jefferson

BEST QUOTES OF THE SHOW:

Bob Enyart:
We don't really encourage our kids to get romantically involved and be dating unless they're of age where they can marry. If they can't get married then you don't want the kids in the church having romantic relationships. It's just not helpful.
:up: I decided a year or so ago that pursuing romantic relationships is a waste of time before being ready for marriage.
 

SOTK

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Originally posted by Lucky

Okay, now that I listened to the show...

:up: I decided a year or so ago that pursuing romantic relationships is a waste of time before being ready for marriage.

Great decision! :thumb:
 

Lighthouse

The Dark Knight
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I've never actually dated anyone.

Lagardo-
Why shouldn't Third day music take center stage? :chuckle:

Honestly, I find that if I listen to the lyrics of most Third day songs, I feel so connected to God, because it causes me to think about my relationship with him, and what he's done for me. Especially the song, 'Thief.'
 

firechyld

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I've never actually dated anyone.

In my teens, I dated a lot* of people that I never slept with. It gave me some preperation for adult relationships, some hard lessons and some great memories. I believe that I benefitted from it, but that may not necessarily be the case for everyone.

* "a lot" as a percentage of the total.
 

Lagardo

New member
Originally posted by lighthouse

Lagardo-
Why shouldn't Third day music take center stage? :chuckle:

I love Third Day and we use a lot of their worship music in our youth service. I was just using them as an example. Substitute any popular Christian band.

Refer back:
quoted from caller pastor Aaron aka Lagardo

And we still see it today where if a kid goes to the Third Day concert, wears the WWJD bracelet and the right t-shirts well then he must be a good kid, he must be on track and he'll be fine and what happens is he graduates and you never see him again.

So there I'm picking on Third Day again. Nah. I just think that too often youth ministry has a poor definition of success. A lot of churches are satisfied when teens begin to absorb aspects of Christian culture. Instead, I'd like to see more churches define success in youth ministry as that moment when a young person begins to allow Christ to truly change his or her life.
 
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