Christ teaches science of salvation to make us teachers.
Last 56 years of my life is under Christ, the teacher of saving (love-integrating) soul. Childish I was then torn-apart by in fighting passions. Though I was not a good student I have learnt something from him. That I must share to become a teacher like him in obedience.
My atheist Brahmin parents were Muslim and Christian hater. They admitted me in paramilitary course at 10 years age so that I can join military to avenge the Muslims who had driven us out of our homeland. I excelled in marksmanship. But parents’ atheism made my life meaningless. So I fled from home at 12 years age to join a Hindu monastery of my forefathers. But residing there for 3 years I was disgusted by their rituals, which couldn’t save them from appalling degradation.
Then searching in other religions I was equally vexed. At last I came in contact with a Christian pastor, who taught me prayers. This began to transform me. This was in fact the primary class of Catholic Church. I expected that here Christ will give me integrity and peace by disciplining my passions.
Here I was told to recite prayers like primary class children are given the numbers and multiplication table for recitation. That quelled the infighting passions temporarily. I got a sort of peace never got before. But that didn't teach me the true integrating love-spiritual soul-love. Pride-infected we all fell from Heaven by rejecting Love-God and here also we all seek gratification of ego and passions, not self-sacrificing soul-love. But that only could love-integrate us by taming the passions.
So my peace was lost again. Even by baptism and sacraments it was not satisfactorily regained. But, love-precept of Christ resonated in my mind. Alas! I tried to love others but failed except in children. So after the final test of my engineering course I volunteered without pay to work in a catholic poor children’s hostel. Loving children there furthered my love-capacity with corresponding degree of soul-integration and peace.
But the authority there wanted me to enter business by taking engineering contracts. I soon became engrossed in it as I had learnt that in my past engineering training. But my spiritual progress reversed. I became bodily and mentally sick to finally break down.
Then I fled from that and went back to atheist Hindu parents. There to forget my frustrations and hold onto sanity I began to like animals for solace. But I knew that soulless animals like toys can’t be loved spiritually. So no spiritual growth comes by such loving but only temporary consolation. In these dark days one miraculous experience lifted me out of it.
I had gone to Calcutta metropolis for job hunt then. Short of money I went to blood bank and gave blood for money. While standing in the quay for money I was conscience-stricken. If Christ had given his body and blood freely for us, how I can sell my blood! I told cashier that I am freely giving my blood for poor patients. I felt on that instant that Christ is blessing me.
Then I was granted a good employment in a polytechnic after a long spell of unemployment. There I volunteered in a social outfit to care for children. That dispelled my animal fad by progress in human love. Then I started an orphanage on my own. Latter I progressed to love the unruly adult students of college avoided by other teachers. By Christ given love I could control their disturbances by persuasion, even by fasting and prayers in difficult cases.
Though my love is carnality-tainted, I had learned from Christ that it can be turned more spiritual by perseverance, penance and prayers. Here no catholic magic of sacraments or the protestant magic of vocal surrender to Christ helped. Following Christ’s teachings is the real surrender even if not done vocally. Only then Holy Spirit can work in us.
Then Christ inspired me to love those more hard to love, for progressing to the highest spiritual Love-God. Those are invalid old people and enemy Muslims who drove us out of homeland. It is the most difficult love, but it is love-integrating me in the past 28 years.
To get nearer the universal love of Christ I have joined the internet community for the last 8 years to embrace the whole humanity. This I am sharing with my brothers and sisters worldwide, who seek Love-God for gaining love-integrity salvation like me.
Last 56 years of my life is under Christ, the teacher of saving (love-integrating) soul. Childish I was then torn-apart by in fighting passions. Though I was not a good student I have learnt something from him. That I must share to become a teacher like him in obedience.
My atheist Brahmin parents were Muslim and Christian hater. They admitted me in paramilitary course at 10 years age so that I can join military to avenge the Muslims who had driven us out of our homeland. I excelled in marksmanship. But parents’ atheism made my life meaningless. So I fled from home at 12 years age to join a Hindu monastery of my forefathers. But residing there for 3 years I was disgusted by their rituals, which couldn’t save them from appalling degradation.
Then searching in other religions I was equally vexed. At last I came in contact with a Christian pastor, who taught me prayers. This began to transform me. This was in fact the primary class of Catholic Church. I expected that here Christ will give me integrity and peace by disciplining my passions.
Here I was told to recite prayers like primary class children are given the numbers and multiplication table for recitation. That quelled the infighting passions temporarily. I got a sort of peace never got before. But that didn't teach me the true integrating love-spiritual soul-love. Pride-infected we all fell from Heaven by rejecting Love-God and here also we all seek gratification of ego and passions, not self-sacrificing soul-love. But that only could love-integrate us by taming the passions.
So my peace was lost again. Even by baptism and sacraments it was not satisfactorily regained. But, love-precept of Christ resonated in my mind. Alas! I tried to love others but failed except in children. So after the final test of my engineering course I volunteered without pay to work in a catholic poor children’s hostel. Loving children there furthered my love-capacity with corresponding degree of soul-integration and peace.
But the authority there wanted me to enter business by taking engineering contracts. I soon became engrossed in it as I had learnt that in my past engineering training. But my spiritual progress reversed. I became bodily and mentally sick to finally break down.
Then I fled from that and went back to atheist Hindu parents. There to forget my frustrations and hold onto sanity I began to like animals for solace. But I knew that soulless animals like toys can’t be loved spiritually. So no spiritual growth comes by such loving but only temporary consolation. In these dark days one miraculous experience lifted me out of it.
I had gone to Calcutta metropolis for job hunt then. Short of money I went to blood bank and gave blood for money. While standing in the quay for money I was conscience-stricken. If Christ had given his body and blood freely for us, how I can sell my blood! I told cashier that I am freely giving my blood for poor patients. I felt on that instant that Christ is blessing me.
Then I was granted a good employment in a polytechnic after a long spell of unemployment. There I volunteered in a social outfit to care for children. That dispelled my animal fad by progress in human love. Then I started an orphanage on my own. Latter I progressed to love the unruly adult students of college avoided by other teachers. By Christ given love I could control their disturbances by persuasion, even by fasting and prayers in difficult cases.
Though my love is carnality-tainted, I had learned from Christ that it can be turned more spiritual by perseverance, penance and prayers. Here no catholic magic of sacraments or the protestant magic of vocal surrender to Christ helped. Following Christ’s teachings is the real surrender even if not done vocally. Only then Holy Spirit can work in us.
Then Christ inspired me to love those more hard to love, for progressing to the highest spiritual Love-God. Those are invalid old people and enemy Muslims who drove us out of homeland. It is the most difficult love, but it is love-integrating me in the past 28 years.
To get nearer the universal love of Christ I have joined the internet community for the last 8 years to embrace the whole humanity. This I am sharing with my brothers and sisters worldwide, who seek Love-God for gaining love-integrity salvation like me.
