toldailytopic: Do you support corporal punishment in schools? Should schools spank di
- Thread starter Nathon Detroit
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exminister
Well-known member
My mother at times instead of her directly punishing me, she would let me know that when my father got home (she had already called him) I was going to be punished. He used a belt, which hung on the wall where I could see it. I spent many hours being terrified. Do you think that was wrong? It wasn't swift. It was lingering, failing in the category of "you think about what you have done". It was almost a relief when he was finally hitting me with the belt.
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I have a couple of reasons for feeling the way I do about this issue. The first is because it is my job to use physical discipline with my child/ren, not the school principal's or the teachers' job. The second reason I feel this way is because, when I was a kid, my mom gave the school permission to paddle us if we misbehaved. Since I liked school (it gave me a place to escape my mom's abuse), I never got paddled. But, both my sisters got the paddle on their backsides quite often. One of my sisters actually got hurt by her teacher paddling her (actually caused the skin to break that time). And, the teacher, instead of owning up to it, reported my mom to child protective services for abuse. On that day, I promised myself that I wouldn't allow anyone but myself or my husband physically discipline my children. And, I didn't. I didn't even allow my mother to physically discipline my daughter (even though my reason for that was the abuse I went through at her hands).
My son and I have spoken about this, his final is that the school will not administer corporal punishment on him, no matter what the consequences are. He insist that it is my responsibility to do such.
Many factors can be added, the teacher doing the paddling what is the state of the teacher, it is well documented that teaching is stressful could it be a release of such frustration that is considered 'alright'. Too many variables. I don't believe there is a course that teachers take on how to beat a child.
As my son sees it, they teach not to be physical with another, but it is alright to physically hit for punishment. To him it doesn't make sense.
And to suggest that a parent watches or administers punishment to their child in front of their peers is truly not well thought out.
Don't forget though the cafeteria is always in need of someone to help with the dishes and clean the kitchen and most assured the maintenance department could use some help scrubbing those toilets and cleaning those class rooms.
Many factors can be added, the teacher doing the paddling what is the state of the teacher, it is well documented that teaching is stressful could it be a release of such frustration that is considered 'alright'. Too many variables. I don't believe there is a course that teachers take on how to beat a child.
As my son sees it, they teach not to be physical with another, but it is alright to physically hit for punishment. To him it doesn't make sense.
And to suggest that a parent watches or administers punishment to their child in front of their peers is truly not well thought out.
Don't forget though the cafeteria is always in need of someone to help with the dishes and clean the kitchen and most assured the maintenance department could use some help scrubbing those toilets and cleaning those class rooms.
exminister
Well-known member
Ephesians 6:4
And, you fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21
Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
I have looked at these texts as being loving to your child and surely thinking before you strike them in anger. I was physically punished a lot growing up even though I was a good kid. My mother had some real anger issues and not many years ago she apologized to me. I only hit my oldest once as a child on the leg and felt bad about it because I was acting out of anger. My youngest I never hit. I found sitting them down and talking to them about their misbehavior did a lot. My youngest really hated that and would start crying right away. We did timeouts. That was sufficient. They have turned out to be very wonderful adults. I wouldn't have wanted some nut teacher hitting my kids. I don't know they would have considered my kids personality as I had and I would be concerned that the teacher would strike in anger. I am against that.
My oldest today is an elementary school teacher. I don't know what all this all the kids today don't respect authority. Her kids love her and she never talks about how she wants or needs to hit this one or that one. I think the news blows out a few bad schools or incidents out of proportion. I think my school growing up was far worse than what she tells me her schools are like today. She has worked in 4 different ones. There was lots of violence going on in the late 60s and early 70s when I was growing up and corporal punishment was allowed in my school. I got hit with one shop teacher's "Peace Maker" broad paddle. Can't say I really respected him after that, but it was rare I misbehaved. I certainly respected and even loved a number of teachers who never used corporal punishment to discipline their class. To me corporal punishment is more about fear than respect.
And, you fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21
Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
I have looked at these texts as being loving to your child and surely thinking before you strike them in anger. I was physically punished a lot growing up even though I was a good kid. My mother had some real anger issues and not many years ago she apologized to me. I only hit my oldest once as a child on the leg and felt bad about it because I was acting out of anger. My youngest I never hit. I found sitting them down and talking to them about their misbehavior did a lot. My youngest really hated that and would start crying right away. We did timeouts. That was sufficient. They have turned out to be very wonderful adults. I wouldn't have wanted some nut teacher hitting my kids. I don't know they would have considered my kids personality as I had and I would be concerned that the teacher would strike in anger. I am against that.
My oldest today is an elementary school teacher. I don't know what all this all the kids today don't respect authority. Her kids love her and she never talks about how she wants or needs to hit this one or that one. I think the news blows out a few bad schools or incidents out of proportion. I think my school growing up was far worse than what she tells me her schools are like today. She has worked in 4 different ones. There was lots of violence going on in the late 60s and early 70s when I was growing up and corporal punishment was allowed in my school. I got hit with one shop teacher's "Peace Maker" broad paddle. Can't say I really respected him after that, but it was rare I misbehaved. I certainly respected and even loved a number of teachers who never used corporal punishment to discipline their class. To me corporal punishment is more about fear than respect.
Different kids respond to different things. Hardly any of them respond well to being hit. It's what parents do when they've failed, and there's nothing left.
The trick is to learn what motivates a child and to use that as means of guiding them along the right path.
The trick is to learn what motivates a child and to use that as means of guiding them along the right path.
Good point. That is why I never spanked my daughter while I was mad about whatever she had done. If I was angry with her for whatever infraction she had committed, I would have her write down why she had done it and what she thought should be done about it. She told me that she would have preferred that I just spanked her because once spanked, the punishment was over. Usually, I would calm down and then, if I thought the offense deserved a spanking, I would spank her. Needless to say, she wasn't spanked with every offense.
Talking to my daughter did help most of the time and sometimes was enough. Time outs never worked for my daughter and grounding rarely worked.
Like you, I didn't want a teacher spanking my daughter (to me, there's a difference between spanking and hitting).
Well, I would like to congratulate you on raising your children well. Different methods of discipline work for different people. Sometimes, all it takes is telling the child that you're disappointed in them for doing something they knew was wrong. Sometimes, it takes a timeout or grounding, and sometimes it takes a spanking to get them to realize that they did something wrong.
I don't think that anyone should physically punish a child but their parents. And, I don't think that anyone who has anger problems should physically punish their children (they can find other methods that would work).
annabenedetti
like marbles on glass
That's really sad to read. No child should spend many hours being terrified. No child should be beaten with a belt. Beating children is wrong, and it's even worse when it's done "in love."
sesseltheologe
New member
No. Every child is different and corporal punishment in schools assumes that it is the best form of punishment for every child. It also assumes that if this form of punishment is administered, there is a one size fits all way of doing it; which leads to another thought—how would I as a parent know that the administrator is administering the punishment in a way that I would find acceptable and not abusive?
IMJerusha
New member
You know, I agree with both Resurrected and Knight but I also agree with Rusha and Vegas. I attended both public and private Christian schools. In the public schools I attended there was no corporal punishment. There also didn't seem to be any effective discipline in the face of wrongs that I witnessed and experienced. In the private school, there was corporal punishment and it was applied both appropriately and inappropriately leaving me to feel that children didn't seem to have any rights when it came to that. The thing is, my parents spanked and that discipline also was appropriately and inappropriately doled out. Parents can make mistakes. When it finally came to my child, the public school administered corporal punishment with parental permission, requiring a signed slip from the parents at the beginning of the school year. My decision based on my experience as a child was to refuse permission to the school to administer corporal punishment, but I wanted to know right away if my son got out of line. I recall several drop what I was doing trips to the school to dole out the necessary parental discipline after getting down to the bottom of things. My son's private Christian school educators refused the parents a choice. Teacher's were permitted to paddle their students if they deemed it appropriate with prior explanation to the Headmistress and a call to the parent. My son only got out of line once and he attended there for many more years than the public school. Discipline does need to be swift and sure but it needs to be meted out with full understanding of the situation and not in an angry or vengeful spirit. Regardless, it's getting to the point anymore where any form of physical discipline of a child is being denied to both school and parent. I believe that had I not been physically disciplined by my parents when it was appropriate, I would not be the person I am today. The same applies to my son who I love very much and am very proud of.
annabenedetti
like marbles on glass
I would never let a school physically punish my child. Never.
Its a tough world out there.
My friend was telling me he used to lecture on and on and on to his kids when they misbehaved and one of them said- "hurry up and belt me , I can't stand it":ha:
LA
My friend was telling me he used to lecture on and on and on to his kids when they misbehaved and one of them said- "hurry up and belt me , I can't stand it":ha:
LA
yes, then that means instead of spanking, you have elected suspension - surely you dont think you should be able to refuse that child receive any penalty at all for breaking the schools guidelines?
Enough suspensions then one can send their kid to a private school, move to another district or homeschool them so the other kids can focus on what school is for instead of learning from children with dicipline problems
I think there is quite a difference in a spanking and a beating.
Do you agree or disagree with these 2 verses?
Proverbs 13:24 He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.
Proverbs 23:13 Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die.
Dena
New member
No, but I don't see why the choice has to be between suspension or a beating. Quite frankly I do not believe there is a reason to hit a child who is of the age to be able to reason. It's nothing more than asserting physical dominance. It does nothing to teach a child proper behavior.
Dena
New member
Me either.
annabenedetti
like marbles on glass
It depends. Some people consider beating with a belt or a switch as a spanking. Others think a light swat on a diapered bottom is a spanking. In my opinion anything that administers purposeful pain to a child for the sake of discipline is too much.
I interpret them differently.
Here's Psalm 23, for an alternate look:
[FONT=trebuchet ms,arial,helvetica] 'Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.' [/FONT]
I posted something on this a long time ago, about the word for rod, shebet, being used as "authority" in Proverbs. I can't find the old link, this may be the same one:
http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/articles/rodstudy.php