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  • #16
    Originally posted by Spitfire View Post
    I actually consider myself to be more introverted than extroverted, though I don't think anyone is one or the other all the time and it depends on a lot on the situation. In some situations, it might seem like I'm actually very extroverted. And it wouldn't surprise me if people who think of themselves as introverted see me as extroverted and vice versa.
    I definitely agree it's quite common, even usual, to be on a continually sliding scale depending on context (are you with family? Old friends? At a party or professional gathering?) but there will be a certain comfort zone that settles as your default.

    I perceive you here as more extroverted than your post numbers would indicate, but as holding back for your own reasons. I could be totally wrong on that, and of course have no idea what you're like in real life situations. Maybe extroverted with family and friends, and less so in large social/professional gatherings? I think that's how a lot of people might be, the middle of the bell curve.

    Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    • #17
      I was only just saying to AMR that I suspect that introverts likely find anonymous places like TOL appealing, allowing them to step into the shoes of an extrovert without much of what would make them nervous or otherwise uncomfortable on that count.

      Though for some reason I'm always surprised by it. I suppose I can't truly understand the introvert. Too alien to my experience. My wife says, "That's right, dear." I don't know what she means by that...

      I suspect she's up to no good.
      You aren't what you eat, but you're always what you swallow.

      Pro-Life






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      • #18
        Originally posted by Town Heretic View Post
        I was only just saying to AMR that I suspect that introverts likely find anonymous places like TOL appealing, allowing them to step into the shoes of an extrovert without much of what would make them nervous or otherwise uncomfortable on that count.
        Hmm... somehow that doesn't feel like a good fit.

        Speaking for myself, I don't come here with the intention of living an alternate life as an extrovert, nor do I desire it. If I did, my post count would reflect it, and I wouldn't delete posts after I make them because I second-guessed them as oversharing.

        Along another line of thought, when posting to someone here I'm not thinking about whether anyone's reading along, I'm focused on that one person. So in that way it still feels like I'm in the proverbial corner at the party, so to speak. And I like it that way.

        Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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        • #19
          ESTJ personality
          sigpic

          .....O LORD my God, in You I put my trust. Psalm 7:1
          .....To You, O LORD, I lift up my soul.
          Psalm 25:1

          Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. ~ Leo Buscaglia

          The best portion of a person’s life -- are the little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love. ~ William Wordsworth

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          • #20
            Originally posted by annabenedetti View Post
            Hmm... somehow that doesn't feel like a good fit.

            Speaking for myself, I don't come here with the intention of living an alternate life as an extrovert, nor do I desire it.
            I didn't mean to imply that as an intention. But it does rather seem that many an introvert is uncommonly bold here and that intimates my point. Additionally, were it not enjoyable so many of them would be loath to continue...and yet.

            If I did, my post count would reflect it, and I wouldn't delete posts after I make them because I second-guessed them as oversharing.
            I didn't mean that everyone so qualifies or that even so it follows that we can entirely escape our natures, however disposed.

            Along another line of thought, when posting to someone here I'm not thinking about whether anyone's reading along, I'm focused on that one person. So in that way it still feels like I'm in the proverbial corner at the party, so to speak. And I like it that way.
            Reasonable enough...and yet you know better and don't communicate exclusively by means that would guarantee that outcome and particular.

            Originally posted by Psalmist View Post
            ESTJ personality
            So at least two extroverts then.
            You aren't what you eat, but you're always what you swallow.

            Pro-Life






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            • #21
              Originally posted by Town Heretic View Post
              I didn't mean to imply that as an intention. But it does rather seem that many an introvert is uncommonly bold here and that intimates my point. Additionally, were it not enjoyable so many of them would be loath to continue...and yet.
              But introversion doesn't exclude boldness, introverts can and do speak up when the situation requires it. I think (not presuming to speak for all of them) that introverts find personal autonomy important, in that they'll speak up when and how they decide the time is right. It's personality, not just behavior.

              I didn't mean that everyone so qualifies or that even so it follows that we can entirely escape our natures, however disposed.
              Or that we're even trying to escape our natures in the first place.
              Reasonable enough...and yet you know better and don't communicate exclusively by means that would guarantee that outcome and particular.
              I know what I just said... I talk to the person, not over his shoulder at the rest of the partygoers.

              Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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              • #22
                Originally posted by annabenedetti View Post
                But introversion doesn't exclude boldness,
                You think that's not an unusual descriptive to apply to an introvert, as a rule?

                introverts can and do speak up when the situation requires it. I think (not presuming to speak for all of them) that introverts find personal autonomy important, in that they'll speak up when and how they decide the time is right. It's personality, not just behavior.
                I suppose it's the whole seeking a public forum to meet strangers and differ as a primary that intrigues me in terms of the introvert's choice.

                Or that we're even trying to escape our natures in the first place.
                That's part of the question, to my mind...though again I don't mean it's even necessarily a conscious choice. I know that public speaking is the number one fear of people but that most people still daydream about being famous, by way of...

                I know what I just said... I talk to the person, not over his shoulder at the rest of the partygoers.
                And yet you have the conversation at a party.
                You aren't what you eat, but you're always what you swallow.

                Pro-Life






                Comment


                • #23
                  Originally posted by Town Heretic View Post
                  You think that's not an unusual descriptive to apply to an introvert, as a rule?
                  No actually, because as Spitfire and I talked about, it can be contextually fluid.
                  I suppose it's the whole seeking a public forum to meet strangers and differ as a primary that intrigues me in terms of the introvert's choice.
                  It's a pretty small community here when you think about it.

                  There's usually not more than 50 or so members here at the same time, and often fewer - and only a handful in on a conversation at any one time.

                  That's part of the question, to my mind...though again I don't mean it's even necessarily a conscious choice. I know that public speaking is the number one fear of people but that most people still daydream about being famous, by way of...
                  They do?? I actually chuckled out loud at that last.

                  Honestly, TH... I don't dream about being famous. Or infamous either, for that matter.

                  In fact, the idea isn't even in my frame of reference. It's fascinating really, comparing how we each look at the world.

                  And no, there's no conscious wish to be an extrovert. I wish a lot of things about my nature could be improved - but I've no desire to be other than how I was made. Getting into the nature/nurture with that thought, there are huge contributions made to our personalities by each, but that's a whole other discussion.

                  And yet you have the conversation at a party.
                  Well, yeah. On my own terms.

                  Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Originally posted by annabenedetti View Post
                    No actually, because as Spitfire and I talked about, it can be contextually fluid.
                    I think that likely has more to do with the percentages than the situation that gives rise.

                    It's a pretty small community here when you think about it.
                    With a fairly large viewing audience.

                    There's usually not more than 50 or so subscribers here at the same time, and often fewer - and only a handful in on a conversation at any one time.
                    With a much larger viewing audience. Though a party of fifty isn't where I'd think to find a majority of introverts voluntarily holding court.

                    They do?? I actually chuckled out loud at that last.
                    They do and I'm happy then, in order.

                    Honestly, TH... I don't dream about being famous.
                    Daydream, which is a bit different. And I suppose that becomes less frequent as we leave our twenties. The things still in front of us that are even tangentially related to a possible outcome on that part shrink, though the remaining options are still rich. But I've rarely met a person with a particular talent that doesn't imagine themselves wildly successful in that. To some extent I believe that's how you get there and why the best athletes actually mentally process success, by way of illustration.

                    Or infamous either, for that matter. In fact, the idea isn't even in my frame of reference. It's fascinating really, comparing how we each look at the world.
                    My daydreams are about what I can do with notoriety and power, money. I suppose it's like Christmas. When you're young you dream about what you'll get. When you're older it shifts to what you'll give.

                    And no, there's no conscious wish to be an extrovert.
                    Seems an unlikely thing to want, given what it would mean. Though I have heard my share of introverts opine about having an ease with, among other things, public speaking. I keep telling my wife that it's like a roller coaster. We both get a very similar feeling approaching it, but I process it as the excitement before the ride and she processes it as the potential for a broken track and a horrific plummeting.

                    I wish a lot of things about my nature could be improved - but I've no desire to be other than how I was made.
                    So you're on the nature side of it then?

                    Getting into the nature/nurture with that thought, there are huge contributions made to our natures by each, but that's a whole other discussion.
                    And an interesting one. Though I don't feel particularly qualified on the point.

                    Re: at the party
                    Well, yeah. On my own terms.
                    Hmmm.
                    You aren't what you eat, but you're always what you swallow.

                    Pro-Life






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                    • #25
                      Personality tests have been around a long long time.

                      Taking the test is a bit like a counseling session: it can help you focus more quickly on your strengths and weaknesses and even help you serve the BoC with your strengths in a more directed manner.
                      My New Years Resolution: 1 Peter 3:15
                      Omniscient without man's qualification. John 1:3 "Nothing"
                      Colossians 1:17 "Nothing" John 15:5 "Nothing"
                      Mighty, ALL mighty (omnipotent). Revelation 1:8
                      No possible limitation Isaiah 40:25 Joshua 24:15
                      Infinite (Omnipresent) Psalm 145:3 Hebrews 4:13

                      ? Yep

                      Now to Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think... Amen. -Ephesians 3:20 & 21

                      ... when I became an adult, I set aside childish ways. Titus 3:10 Ephesians 4:29-32; 5:11

                      Separation of church and State is not atheism "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights..."

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                      • #26
                        Introverts are thoughtful, deliberate, innovators. I would have thought Town to be an Ambivert.

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                        • #27
                          I have to leave soon (no, not to go to a party) so I'll answer this and you can decide what to do with it.

                          Originally posted by Town Heretic View Post
                          I think that likely has more to do with the percentages than the situation that gives rise.
                          I disagree. More on that later if you want.

                          With a fairly large viewing audience.

                          With a much larger viewing audience. Though a party of fifty isn't where I'd think to find a majority of introverts voluntarily holding court.
                          1. That you're considering the viewing audience makes my earlier point.
                          2. It's not a party of 50 in one thread. For example, I just looked at this thread, and you and I are the only ones here at the moment.
                          3. Holding court? Again, that's a huge difference in outlook between you and me, and one I illustrated earlier (wrt talking over someone's shoulder).

                          Daydream, which is a bit different.
                          Okay. Well, I don't do that either. (Yes, I daydream - no, I don't daydream about power, money, notoriety.)
                          And I suppose that becomes less frequent as we leave our twenties and thirties behind us. The things still in front of us that are even tangentially related to a possible outcome on that part shrink, though the remaining options are still rich. But I've rarely met a person with a particular talent that doesn't imagine themselves wildly successful in that. To some extent I believe that's how you get there and why the best athletes actually mentally process success of every sort.
                          That may have more to do with drive and ambition than introvert/extrovert.

                          My daydreams are about what I can do with notoriety and power, money.
                          Mine - never. Ever ever. And beyond that, no - I'm not sharing.

                          Seems an unlikely thing to want, given what it would mean. Though I have heard my share of introverts opine about having an ease with, among other things, public speaking. I keep telling my wife that it's like a roller coaster. We both get a very similar feeling approaching it, but I process it as the excitement before the ride and she processes it as the potential for a broken track and a horrific plummeting.
                          Or, an extrovert may find it easy and doable, and an introvert may find it easy and doable. Introversion doesn't necessarily mean fear of public speaking, someone could be quite introverted but very assured in his knowledge of his subject and that assurance gives him the confidence needed to pull off a really great talk. There's so much more I could say about that if I had the time.


                          So you're on the nature side of it then?
                          I'd gone back and corrected that to 'personality' while you were replying. No, I'm pretty much solidly centered between the two, although I see environment (particularly in the gestational period) as tipping the scales in having an effect on both genetics (nature) and nurture, so if I had to tilt, it would be towards nurture. And what a rich conversation that would be, if I had the time. I'm wishing I could give it the attention it deserves.

                          Re: at the party

                          Hmmm.
                          Yep. As in: making sure I don't have to depend on someone else for transportation so I can arrive and leave when I want to, having access to those corners or pockets of conversation along the edges of the crowd, being able to slip in and slip away without being noticed... that sort of thing. I've had to learn over the years how to work a room and I can do it when it's necessary, but it's a learned skill, not an innate desire.

                          Gotta run.

                          Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by Uberpod1 View Post
                            Introverts are thoughtful, deliberate, innovators.
                            You could say the same about extroverts. There's a danger of broadbrushing an entire cohort with positive and negative behaviors and I'm trying not to do that.

                            Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Originally posted by annabenedetti View Post
                              I disagree. More on that later if you want.
                              I disagree with your disagreement. At your service.

                              1. That you're considering the viewing audience makes my earlier point.
                              Or, more than one of the questions you'll find on the test involves how you relate to large numbers of people and how you feel about it. Considering that only makes sense, which is why I did.

                              2. It's not a party of 50 in one thread. For example, I just looked at this thread, and you and I are the only ones here at the moment.
                              But who's counting? (supra )

                              3. Holding court? Again, that's a huge difference in outlook between you and me, and one I illustrated earlier (wrt talking over someone's shoulder).
                              I agree, how the extrovert and introvert see a setting should and likely tends to differ.

                              Okay. Well, I don't do that either.
                              Interesting. I think that's unusual. I'd expect a doctor to want to cure cancer or have an astonishing success rate, a singer to imagine himself front and center of a concert, etc.

                              That may have more to do with drive and ambition than introvert/extrovert.
                              Which may have something to do with being an extrovert. I think it's difficult to be one and not aspire in that particular.

                              Mine - never. Ever ever. And beyond that, no - I'm not sharing.
                              Interesting. Why so emphatic and I'd expect not, in order.

                              Or, an extrovert may find it easy and doable, and an introvert may find it easy and doable. Introversion doesn't necessarily mean fear of public speaking,
                              Not exactly, but it is reasonably much more likely.

                              someone could be quite introverted but very assured in his knowledge of his subject and that assurance gives him the confidence needed to pull off a really great talk.
                              I didn't speak to effectiveness, though I'd expect that to be tied, to some extent, to the ability to connect to an audience and that would be another weakness for the introvert.

                              There's so much more I could say about that if I had the time.
                              Attending an introvert pride parade are you?

                              I'd gone back and corrected that to 'personality' while you were replying. No, I'm pretty much solidly centered between the two, although I see environment (particularly in the gestational period) as tipping the scales in having an effect on both genetics (nature) and nurture, so if I had to tilt, it would be towards nurture. And what a rich conversation that would be, if I had the time. I'm wishing I could give it the attention it deserves.
                              Nothing pressing. Soon then.

                              Yep. As in: making sure I don't have to depend on someone else for transportation so I can arrive and leave when I want to, having access to those corners or pockets of conversation along the edges of the crowd, being able to slip in and slip away without being noticed... that sort of thing. I've had to learn over the years how to work a room and I can do it when it's necessary, but it's a learned skill, not an innate desire.
                              Which is sort of moving back toward my point. I think an extrovert can value the monastic and contemplative, but is built to thrive and desire, more frequently, a different environment. And what we are most at ease with and inclined to we will almost always tend to be more likely to excel at, to tie in.

                              Gotta run.
                              Singularly or in a group? Later then. Have fun.
                              You aren't what you eat, but you're always what you swallow.

                              Pro-Life






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                              • #30
                                INTP

                                The only area where I'm really off-balance is the extrovert-introvert spectrum. I'm 80% introverted. I really don't like people. Just being honest. As a general rule, I seek balance. Perhaps, that has something to with my astrological sign - Libra.

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